20 March 2011

Pushing Water

There are days when it honestly feels like I am pushing water. Uphill. With my bare hands. Today has been one such day. I don't know why...I just feel overwhelmed and...like I could cry until I have no more tears. The more I try and do the less I seem to accomplish. My weekends just don't feel long enough. I feel like I barely scratch the surface and then another week dawns and I'm left scrambling.

As I mentioned in (Re-)Release, I've been arguing with myself over a rather big (family-specific) decision. And I've reached a decision...which is right for me. And I promise I will explain rather that write cryptic sentences *grin* But...I think I need to be in a slightly better place to write such a post...and ATM all I want to do is curl up in bed with Jordan Castillo Price's GhosTV. So that is what I'm going to do. I'm sorry I haven't been online, haven't visited. I will. I just need to find the balance I seem to have lost. And in the interim, I would like to introduce you to one of my favourite songs. It's the perfect song on such days.

12 comments:

  1. ((Hugs))... hope all is better soon.

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  2. Take care of yourself Orannia, and take your time. Enjoy JCP.

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  3. *BIG HUG* Enjoy the GhosTV immersion and let the world take care of itself for a while...

    My favorite song called "Don't Give Up"...

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  4. ((((hugs)))) Take care, honey!

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  5. *hugs* I'm sending good thoughts your way, hon.

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  6. Hang in there, sweetie!

    Yes, that song is a really special one (and has personal significance for me, too.)

    Glad you're treating yourself good, and snuggling up with Vic and Jacob.

    I hear ya, with trying to just tread water. We'll be here waiting, and until then, we always have goodreads. ;-)

    ((hugs))

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  7. Sometimes, when I feel like that, I find I'm trying to make everyone happy but myself. When I define what I care about and focus on that, it gets easier. Hope you're able to take a break and regroup, that feeling sucks.

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  8. I know that feeling. Hang in there and soon better things will come!

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  9. Mariana - thank you :)

    Hilcia - many thanks. *deep breath* Unfortunately, I've had to put JCP down, but only until the weekend, and then Vic, Jacob & I are back together...looking for messages in oatmeal *grin*

    Janna - many thanks sweetie :)

    Chris - thank you. Ohhh, strong lyrics on that song!

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  10. Eyre - thank you. Hope all is well with you this week?

    Renee - many thanks. And yes to GoodReads. It seems...less daunting (if that makes sense).

    Meoskop - that's it. I've been trying and trying to make everyone happy, fix everything...and I've just realized I can't do it any more. Because I'm not happy. And I guess my decision is doing...just like you said...define what I care about and focus on that. But...it's not going to be easy, as I discovered today. Because people think I should keep...doing what I'm doing. But I know how I feel now, so I'm going to stand firm. Or at least try :) Thank you. *hugs*

    heidenkind - many thanks. Working on it :)

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  11. It's both a sad and a hopeful song, isn't it?

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  12. Chris - yes. Makes it more real.

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